I am often surprised when I tell someone that I am bleeding and I am met with an uncomfortable look and a “ah shame!” These days I often forget that so many women and humans in female bodies who don’t identify as women, are so disconnected and uncomfortable with the menstrual cycle. The collective belief around this process being dirty, shameful, painful, a punishment, and something to hide away, is simply sinful. It cuts us off from the raw power that we hold, or rather that flows through our vessels. This process holds magic beyond our comprehension.
I will never forget the day that my divine friend Malaika Evans said to me: “Across all cultures and religions mankind worships the creator, where we come from, and if I look at it honestly the womb is where we come from, and so if we should be worshiping anything it should be that.”
This simple statement, so obvious and honest, really drives it home. The womb is our sacred origin, our pure beginning, our connection to the other realms, the place where we entered in? What could be more sacred than that? Yet we have been taught that the pain of bleeding and childbirth is a punishment for our sins. What more profound privilege could there be than being a portal for the divine to flow through? Is it possible that the pain we experience is because of our very disconnection from the sacredness of this process? Is this why some women can experience orgasm and ecstasy in the moments said to be most painful? Or indeed if pain must be present can we see it as a beautiful and necessary part of life instead of something to be numbed and shamed?
On my journey of healing my womb of PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and healing my menstrual cycle - which was incredibly painful and depressing; my friendship with Malaika was one of the main inspirations. This Quing (King+Queen) was on a super-focused womb healing journey and I was inspired to do the same. At this stage, I had inadvertently shut my cycle down through the use of the Mirena IUD which switches everything off for 5 years. Such was my relationship with my flow that I would rather switch it off than deal with it while in the masculine space of University. I would never recommend anyone do this, although I acknowledge how important this was as a part of my healing journey. In an almost-crazy-response to the switching off, I missed the release that my cycle provided. It helped me to heal the way that I viewed this cycle.
Malaika showed me how she used crystals and meditation to focus healing upon her womb. I started exploring books about the magic of the womb and working with energy medicine to invoke a healed cycle by honoring my womb, through connecting with her. I spoke to her, I drew her, I visualized her.
This work culminated in my fourth-year body of artwork for my BAFA degree: The Womb Healing Spell (2018) where I recorded several rituals around invoking healing over my womb. See some more of the images here. After creating this body of work I have constantly been approached by humans with wombs to provide mentorship around healing the womb. It is only now after many years, and yet another request for this program, that I have answered the call and asked Malaika and Ncumisa to facilitate with me. Both of these divine WOMBen have inspired me upon my journey and are powerful healers in their own right. I am truly honored to work with these magic humans. Anyone joining this program is blessed to connect with these powerful healers. The timing couldn't be more perfect for me to revisit this medicine. There is always more to uncover here - always more to heal. And this is one of those journeys well worth revisiting, time and again.
By the time it came to remove the Mirena, I was so excited to embrace my blood and to work with her magic. I still play with her every time she comes. I am so excited to open this portal with powerful humans. I am so excited to share healing energy.
Are you ready to honor yourself and the power of your process and flow? Are you ready to drop the shame and stigma? Are you ready to access your true healing and power?
